Lynn's guide to life

everyone would have to, at some point of their lives, dump someone. and when someone reaches this point in their life, they would have to face the breakup pep talk.
examples:

"oh john! its not you! its me!"
the classic 'its not you its me'

"john.. you're a great guy...too great even. i don't deserve you. i deserve someone so much better than me"
the 'im not good enough for you' speech

"john...its obvious we not working out...we are going our seperate ways.. but we'd still be friends!"
the 'we'd be better off without each other" conclusion

there are many others... no doubt, creative, orginal, innovative ones are always appreciated. maybe something like :"my grandmother's sick and bedridden (is tt one word or two?).. i have to move to Zimbabwe to nurse her. so i guess we cant see each other anymore. and oh yes-there's no phone/internet connection there.

as you can see, we always try to soften the blow. and rightly so. this bring me to my next point. and if u haven't already noticed i am writing this from a girl's point of view. there are only a few things tt warrant you to not try to soften the blow. (this is ranked)

1) he cheats on you
2) he pressures you to have sex, and even gets anrgy when you say no.
3)he disses you behind your back, to his friends.

i bring this topic up because no. 2) has happened to someone i know. n she cracked her brain on how to soften the blow. supernice of her of course. but again, she didnt have to.

however, the focus now is on no. 1).

im watching One Hour Photo now, an academy award film starring Robbin Williams.
to sum it up, robbin willaims is syg, who develops pictures at a photo shop in a shopping centre. there's a family of three, mum, dad n son, who develop their photos at this photos shop, and have been doing so for the past like..decade. so basically he becomes obsessed with this family (he has none) and has like a shrine of all their pictures.. and they all look happy in jovial, a picture perfect family. one day this random lady with long red hair comes to dvp her photos. and as he develops it, he sees the husband of that family(the bastard) with the lady with long red hair girl (the slut) acting intimately together. he gets really anrgy and hurt, i assume its becasue he really took to the family and feels hurt for them. and takes revenge for the wife by breaking into a hotel room the bastard and slut were sharing in the middle of them having sex. he comes in with a dagger and forces them to have sex.. and basically the slut's like crying n shaking n shit.. n im going :"yeah!! u deserve tt bitch!!!! he's a married man!!! suck on that slut!"

the point im trying to make is that cheating on someone is one thing. cheating and getting caught is whole new thing.

as much as i hope and pray almost every alternate day that my marriage would be like those in romance books, the undying love, im also hestitant to say that i would never cheat on my husband, EVER. i mean, who knows??
now i might say something like that now because it is against my morals, but what if the undying love, well, doesnt die, but goes into like a temporary coma? i hate to see myself as someone who might cheat on her husband. i would rather be oblivious and naive and just dreamily and haughtily say Never Ever would i do something like that, and that its just something i cannot see myself doing. but im more afraid of growing up, and if i cheated on my husband, becoming someone i hated as a child, looked down on as a child and becoming someone i swore i would never be.

in that sense im a coward. i say that i might cheat on my husband now so that in future, if that happens, i could go easier on my conscience.

watching One Hour Photo (that just ended two seconds ago) helped me imagine the day i find out my husband/boyfriend is cheating on me. when the wife in the movie saw the picture of her husband and the other woman, what i felt then is probably 0.1% of what she was feeling, and what i would feel if that happened to me.

and then i started to imagine hanafi with another girl, like in the pictures in that movie. and quickly pushed that thought aside because it scared the shit outta me.

its one thing seeing your spouse with someone else, but its another seeing your spouse with someone else, happy, and laughing. especially if he/she was never as happy with you.

hypothetical question:
would you rather be in a loveless but faithful relationship, or a one filled with love and happiness, but have ur spouse also sharing this love with someone else?