Losing It
When would a girl know she's ready? I've asked myself that at least a couple of times and while most people would say 'you'd just know' as though I'm a bloody shrink, the answer to that question is that you wouldn't know until after you've lost it.
This is how it works:
So you've lost it to your guy. Assuming he was still there the next morning when u wake up, tells you he had a most wonderful night, comforts you a little bit for your loss and gets up to make you breakfast. There could be two scenarios:
1) You start sobbing. You feel you've let the whole world down and how you'd ever be able to hold up head up high is unimaginable. You start to fret u might get pregnant. In this situation you still cannot find out if you were actually ready. Unless…
i. He sees you're really shaken up about it and tries to comfort you. He reassures you that he loves you and he wasn't just in it for the sex and will stick around. You believe him and start to smile and relax. If you're lucky, he stays true to his word. Only then you would know you were ready, emotionally mature enough to handle it, maybe just a little shaken by the experience and needed time to calm down.
ii. He sees you're really shaken up about it and tries to comfort you. 'DON'T TOUCH ME YOU BASTARD', you say, and run out of the room to your mother, spill the beans, get disowned and sign up for counselling/group therapy. He is left confused as a few hours ago you were saying: 'YES YES! TOUCH ME THERE NOW!' Only then you would know you weren't ready.
2) You say to yourself: 'that was a good experience. Pleasure has a price'. And you get up to cuddle and eat the breakfast he's made. Your relationship goes on fine and break up months later not because of this issue. Only then would you know you were ready. Readier than girl from Scenario 1i).
And what of girls who lost their cherry to the odd guy? Well, first that is a silly silly thing to do. If…(this is assuming the odd guy won't be sticking around for the next sunrise)
1). You say to yourself:' Hell yeah!' You would be sure you were ready. Maybe even too ready. Too ready to respect your cherry.
2). Scenario 1ii) repeats except for the bit where he tries to comfort you. You feel worse because you realise you don't even know his last name and his name could have been spelt John or Jon or Jonathan. You wouldn't know if you were truly ready because the experience might have been different if it was a different guy, if it was a boyfriend so you won't feel like such a slut.
This is why what happens immediately after sex or what not is crucial.
Sex- it's taunting you and teasing you. How daring are you? How much are you willing to risk? How boring are you? How exciting? It does that because you don't know the answers to these questions until you've tried it and you want to find out. It's an IQ test. It tells you whether you’re a bright girl who chose the right guy, or a dim one, who chose a wrong one. It's a personality test: are you a slut or not? It’s a test of how much your family loves you.
And what of guys? I'd say they are ready anytime from the age of 0 onwards.
How would a girl ensure that she wouldn’t feel like crap after losing it? How could you ensure you wouldn't feel cheated after having sex for the first time? I have often asked myself if there was a way to protect myself from the emotional trauma after my membrane tears. Well, there is a way: the Bunny.
Instead of losing your virginity to a guy who might really be a jerk, you could lose it to yourself. As you turn the Bunny on to 'low', you know that you aren’t giving your cherry to a guy whom you might never see again. In a strange way, because you lose your virginity to yourself, you keep it with you even after you lose it. It's like keeping the family heirloom within the family. Although it is a waste of cherry to be given to a pink rubber toy.
The bottom line is, some girls are lucky, some aren't. If you happen to be one of the unlucky ones, tough.
This is how it works:
So you've lost it to your guy. Assuming he was still there the next morning when u wake up, tells you he had a most wonderful night, comforts you a little bit for your loss and gets up to make you breakfast. There could be two scenarios:
1) You start sobbing. You feel you've let the whole world down and how you'd ever be able to hold up head up high is unimaginable. You start to fret u might get pregnant. In this situation you still cannot find out if you were actually ready. Unless…
i. He sees you're really shaken up about it and tries to comfort you. He reassures you that he loves you and he wasn't just in it for the sex and will stick around. You believe him and start to smile and relax. If you're lucky, he stays true to his word. Only then you would know you were ready, emotionally mature enough to handle it, maybe just a little shaken by the experience and needed time to calm down.
ii. He sees you're really shaken up about it and tries to comfort you. 'DON'T TOUCH ME YOU BASTARD', you say, and run out of the room to your mother, spill the beans, get disowned and sign up for counselling/group therapy. He is left confused as a few hours ago you were saying: 'YES YES! TOUCH ME THERE NOW!' Only then you would know you weren't ready.
2) You say to yourself: 'that was a good experience. Pleasure has a price'. And you get up to cuddle and eat the breakfast he's made. Your relationship goes on fine and break up months later not because of this issue. Only then would you know you were ready. Readier than girl from Scenario 1i).
And what of girls who lost their cherry to the odd guy? Well, first that is a silly silly thing to do. If…(this is assuming the odd guy won't be sticking around for the next sunrise)
1). You say to yourself:' Hell yeah!' You would be sure you were ready. Maybe even too ready. Too ready to respect your cherry.
2). Scenario 1ii) repeats except for the bit where he tries to comfort you. You feel worse because you realise you don't even know his last name and his name could have been spelt John or Jon or Jonathan. You wouldn't know if you were truly ready because the experience might have been different if it was a different guy, if it was a boyfriend so you won't feel like such a slut.
This is why what happens immediately after sex or what not is crucial.
Sex- it's taunting you and teasing you. How daring are you? How much are you willing to risk? How boring are you? How exciting? It does that because you don't know the answers to these questions until you've tried it and you want to find out. It's an IQ test. It tells you whether you’re a bright girl who chose the right guy, or a dim one, who chose a wrong one. It's a personality test: are you a slut or not? It’s a test of how much your family loves you.
And what of guys? I'd say they are ready anytime from the age of 0 onwards.
How would a girl ensure that she wouldn’t feel like crap after losing it? How could you ensure you wouldn't feel cheated after having sex for the first time? I have often asked myself if there was a way to protect myself from the emotional trauma after my membrane tears. Well, there is a way: the Bunny.
Instead of losing your virginity to a guy who might really be a jerk, you could lose it to yourself. As you turn the Bunny on to 'low', you know that you aren’t giving your cherry to a guy whom you might never see again. In a strange way, because you lose your virginity to yourself, you keep it with you even after you lose it. It's like keeping the family heirloom within the family. Although it is a waste of cherry to be given to a pink rubber toy.
The bottom line is, some girls are lucky, some aren't. If you happen to be one of the unlucky ones, tough.
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