Shoot me, Paparazzi

Mummy dearest, i love you. Thanks so much for helping with virtually everything for my formal. Thanks for helping me draw my eyebrows, pick my dress, put flowers in my hair, chose my brooch...love you!

can you tell its my house?

brendan and i, on my balcony.. we were looking into his mum's camera.

left to right: rach, steph, jason, me, lauren waugh, horner, rob k, lauren chesterman..stupid wind blowing my hair and making it stick to my lip gloss..

Steph's pre-pre-drinks.. lol.. we were splitting up at pre-drinks so we wanted to catch up before going our seperate ways...stpeh and hornicles here with me

chel's pre-drinks....note the similarities... and we didnt plan this!

in the limo...

i cant be bothered rotating this but you can be bothered turning your head. nicole franklin..

still in the limo.. elly danks in the blue..one of the best dancers at the school..

peter k and steph, my best geography buds! Peter's my MDC, Im his LDC. True love. lol

no.. he's not sleeping..his eyes are in fact open.

No Cadillac, no perms, you can't see
That he's a motherfucking P-I-M-P

jonno!....who kept adjusting his hair so vainly for pictures... this was actually from his camera i think..

say 'ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh'

my too fav asian boys! lol.. we're the only cool ones in our chinese class of five... andrew looks like he's falling asleep as usual..

tommie and loz, jason and steph... and horner.. lol...

ironically rach's fav move.. she cant do this so she makes me do it. i secretly like it.

exner, who looks like an utter beach-bum with his surf hair.

this is rachel's most serious expression...

lol.. ah.. the love-hate relationship...

ching, the loaded mainlander, dearest jonno who not only had the honour of naming scotty, but who was fully convinced i dont eat beef cos im hindu, and a random international kid...

joey and i danced in House Dance Competition

tom mcnicol, who i love dearly when he plays the sax on stage.

Earth to Lynn

the past few weeks have been pure madness for me. i had done 2 additional (but optional) maths portfolios in 2 weeks, and have bitched about so much you know you're not really my friend if you havent heard about it. 5 mins after i handed the first one in i started breaking down in the car on the way to my mum's asian grocer...and i had disgustingly stayed up till 3am working on the second one.
before i could catch a breath i had to prepare for my eng oral commentaries, where i had to study the whole of fucking Hamlet and 10 Atwood and Heaney poems for a 10min commentry that was worth the most important 15% of my final english mark. Don't get me wrong, i love the texts, in particlular Hamlet. But when you have to speak in front of two examiners and a video recorder, it does get abit nerve-racking the way you cant help but hang on every nod either examiner gives you.
The very next day was the day of my yr12 formal (prom). i started getting ready at about 1pm for the formal at 7.30 lol.. talk about frockin up. i had asked brendan to come with me and i wasnt the only one who kinda freaked out after he said yes. lol.. mum, you just have a tendency to hate every single male i show remote interest in. Scotty, when you receive pics of me and brendan-with-his-face-cut-out-and-replaced-with-yours, you'll know how much i wished it had been you. nonetheless, let me speak about how the evening went and credit given to my date, in case he chances upon this site. Bredan was every bit the gentleman.. the lil talk his mum gave him in front of me about 'taking care of Lynn not in a ninja way' was amusing and slightly awkward..
i got to the hairdressers at 2pm and my hair took an hour -it was gorgeous. then i got home to change n started getting really stressed putting on my eyemakeup i had to shoo my brother away and also put on my full-length white dress i got from singapore.... good ol Daniel Yam...when the divine ritual was over i made my way to Steph's pre-pre drinks lol.. just an excuse for more alcohol and more cam-whoring. I had fun there... pics are following soon in case ur wondering. at 5pm i returned home n packed a change of clothes (a very skanky/hot dress i borrowed from my sis) for the after-party. not long after, brendan and his mum came to pick me up to drive us to chelsea's pre-drinks (photos coming later), all while doing the whole "opening the car door/after you miss" thing.
When brendan n i introduced ourselves to some outside-school dates, his mum came over to tell brendan that he had to introduce me.. so i was obviously feeling every bit the uncomfortable-but-truly-loving-it date. i met some really nice people who were dates to wesley students.. some boring hoes in their tasteless unclassy dresses and smiled politely at them.. before the pre-drinks party split into two limos all of us gathered on chel's main stairs and the whole horde of paparazzi parents were clickling insanely away... while I was struggling to look into different cameras whenever i saw i flash go off, thinking wow, the camera loves me.. but really knowing the parents were taking photos of their children... lol...
the limo wasnt as exciting as i thought it would be.. it really just feels very normal.. lol.. we stopped by a drink store to get some drinks and then headed to the formal...
again... i cant really describe how the formal went except it was amazing.. except for those fat chicks in tiny dresses that scared me and made me hold more desperatetly on my date's arm..or whoever happened to be beside me at that time....and before i go on.. let me get it straight and out in the open: WEAR THICK STRAPS IF YOU HAVE FAT/BROAD SHOULDERS.


i always thought this was a given but apparently not. apparently these chicks' mothers dontt love them enough to tell them the truth either. you can tell my mummy
loves me cos when i wear something trendy but ugly on me, she dishes it out. =)

all throughout the formal i was desperately trying to get pics of as many people as possible but giving up everynow and then cos you cant maximise the enjoyment when your busy taking photos...i also noticed people loved to see me and brendan together more than me and brendan did..lol..we had to stop to pose for people a number of times.. they have more photos of us than i do.. which is why i had to create a MySpace account (Oz version of friendster) just to get pics of Jonno!.. jonno better love me. everyone loved my dress and i was thankful i didnt have to worry about someone else wearing the same/similar dress...a lowlight however, was that someone steped on my foot during the formal and i had a small round bruise on my foot, the size of a heel.. tt really hurt...o! and i also danced what little ballroom i knew with Mcnicol, my fav new toy boy... who doesnt get sexual benefits.. lol..

after party was really dissapointing and a rip off cos alcohol wasnt provided... so brendan and i and a few of his other mates went off to one of his mates where we continued drinking and taking photo's of Nenna's bleeding tongue as a result of a very hungry person eating a quarter-pounder... as the night wore on, we watched Harry Potty till 5am...

***

the next day i went to bed at 1am.. i have no idea how i managed to get through the sunday with all of 4 hours of bad-quality sleep.... i lay wake thinking of how I'm going to celebrate my 18th bday in singapore...

Covering my Bases

I admit I am very clumsy when it comes to doing housework. As such, whenever I offer my help to the rest of my family to do housework, I receive nothing less than a scoff in my face. ‘Huh?! YOU’ll mop the floor?!” either with genuine or mock intent. When I do mop the floor, for example, again, ‘This is what you call mopping?’ is only one of the many condescending, albeit boring comments I receive. It was humorous when I first heard these comments, as I myself found the image of me cleaning the toilet rather unbelievable too. However, after awhile, comments of such a nature become annoying, and frankly quite biting. it also does not help that I'm the youngest and people seem to think I'm still the little 9 year old I used to be. So, I have since stopped offering my help in doing housework.

Today when my brother and I were at the post office to collect my parcel my father sent me from Singapore, I realised I had left my identification card in the car, which I needed to claim the parcel. ‘Eh, help me go and get can Kor?’ was my immediate thought. For some admittedly unexplainable reason, I was under the impression that the person in name had to stay in the post office. I waited and a couple of minutes passed (the car was about 100m away). I see my brother coming back in sight, walking at a pace only slightly faster than a stroll. It was as though he was grocery shopping instead of trying to get my identification card to me while I was waiting at the counter. ‘wahaha, could you have been any slower?’ was my immediate reaction, as opposed to the ‘thank you’ my brother was obviously expecting. His response to my seemingly ungrateful jest was ‘FUCK MAN!! The least you could do is say thank you!! My response to his unexpected outburst was ‘huh? Eh your crazy man’. I was puzzled as to why he had such a violent reaction to what I had said.

I go back to the car with me still being puzzled but I had a mind to tell him that my words, albeit impolite, did not warrant such an extreme reaction. I said that if he was rightly unhappy with what I said, he could just had said ‘you are so ungrateful’ or ‘how about a thank you?’ Not ‘FUCK MAN!!’ If it had been me collecting the ID card for him, not only would I have walked with a tinge of urgency, I also sincerely doubt I would have such a vulgar and volatile reaction if he did not thank me right away. Of course, in his defence, I should have said ‘thank you’ even though I claim I was only kidding when I didn’t. The card was mine to get and he had done me a favour. He then said that I ‘treat everyone like a slave. I’m 18 years old and don’t do any housework’. I continued to argue that he was too sensitive and this was not the first occasion where I felt so, and that his ego is too big.

Ego is problem in every single member of my family. Each of us thinks everyone else has a mountain of an ego. My family thus also values the humility in being the first to apologise in any heated dispute. It seems to be, through many years of observation, and the first person to apologise is somehow partially absolved from any faults of theirs. The first person who apologises is put in better light then the person who’s ego is too big to do so. To prevent myself from being deemed ‘pot calling the kettle egoistic’, tonight’s speech at dinner will go as such:

Kor, I admit I was wrong in not first saying ‘thank you’ after you went to get the ID which was only mine to get. So, I’m very sorry. On a separate topic, I want to talk about me doing housework. Some of you think that I ‘treat everyone as slaves’. In any situation, a person can only offer their help so many times, and can be turned down only so many times, before the person becomes discouraged, and cant quite be bothered to continue offering help. A person can only take so much in-your-face scoffing before they get annoyed and hurt (and feel handicapped and useless). So if you haven’t already noticed, I have long since stopped offering my help in doing housework. However, if any of you feel that its so unfair that you are doing housework while I am not; if you feel that I’m ‘treating you as my slave’, you need only ask me to help do some housework.

***
He who does eventually ask me to do housework admits to having once being a slave to me.

Lynn on Finding The One

You might watch movies like Kate and Leopold, You've Got Mail, When Harry Met Sally, etc, and think that there is such a thing called true love. the most deluded amongst us even believe in finding The One. The rest of the world barely manages to tolerate them because their illusions serve as a form of entertainment for the rest of us. Yes, im talking to all the girls ranging from ages 12-60and all the boys ranging from ages17-19.

while i am skeptical of true love (that is not blind or selfish), i have a theory on True Love: THERE IS NO SUCH BLOODY THING.

i elaborate... unlike some species of penguins, humans do not have that One person who is destined to be with them forever and ever and blah. we go through our lives, dating many different people. We meet this person whom we think is The One, but really, we're only saying that so we can continue to lead our safe but ignorant lives. My thinking is that there are at least another 500 people out there, who are just as compatible and suitable to your needs, characteristics and lifestyle. Who make us feel the same way, and even possibly give us more orgasms in one night. Yet, we stick our heads in the sand and trick ourselves into thinking this person is The One. The reason why we end up marrying The One, as opposed to the hundrends of potential other ones, is that we marry the most ideal one, based on context.

by context i mean, time, age, place, job, lifestyle, etc. Your overall 'current situation'.
You're 38. you've married your One. At work you meet this hot ass older man who knocks you off your feet. The chemistry between you is of galactic (is tt even a word?) scale. Even more so than what you and your husband shared when you were first dating (we make allowanced for marriage ruining the sex life). so, why isnt this guy The One? Despite the fact that he make you so perfectly and simply, happy, he is not The One. Why? You're married, you have 2 kids, you're 38 and really shouldnt be acting like a teenager in love.

I'm 18. Im dating a guy who i can see marrying in 10 years time (ignoring the fact that if it wasnt because of the fact that my parents hate him and that i would have to convert my religion). He makes me laugh and feel special, and is one of the few people a can truly truly talk to, and i can see us go the distance. Yet, I know that there is just nooooo way I am actually going to marry him.

I meet him 10 years later, he has a stable income, and is ready to settle down. He suddenly pulls a 'candidate shift' to being The One. Assuming we break up tomorrow, how will I ever know if he was in fact The One, if only I met him in a later part of my life?

You think someone isnt ideal for You but isnt just that that someone isnt ideal for your current situation?

gay it forward

here are a few pics from fri, the 13th of july. steph had her 18th with a halloween themed party. i went as a fairy (u cant really tell cos my wings got itchy after awhile n i took them off). above is lauren c n horner. lauren went as a vamp... horner as a vampire.

this is my favtest pic!. altho rach will kill me if she noes i put a picture of her and her armpit patch on the internet. oh well.. i do look fabgorgeous in there.

o!.. n here too!

me n the birthday girl. im so proud of her. she's coming to singapore!

the redness of my face is only and purely due to the blusher i used.

and below is me n horner n steph with our present to her. its of a black guy playing the trumpet (which steph plays n lvoes) in a jazz bar (which steph loves to go to). it was the perfect gift for her.

well.. be grateful u cant see that clearly in this photo.

GAY IT FORWARD

From my fav sitcome right now, Will and Grace, is the term coined by the character Jack Macfarlane. In this epi, Jack and Will meet a newly-out gay (aww) who is mad about will. will isnt too keen but jack convinces him that 'senior gays' like themselves should take new comers under their wing. Because tts what u do in a gay community - you gay it forward.

Santa, this christmas i want a gay friend.

please check out urbandictionary.com and type in 'singaporean' and 'mainlander' in the search bar. thanks!

did you know?

1. did you know eating KFC popcorn chicken relieves a sore throat? i just found that out today when what i thought to be a sin for my sore throat turned out to be the total opposite.

2. did you know the last time my heart beat increased rapidly due to the impending meeting with a guy was in december 2006? is that sad or what? at least that helps differentiate the guys i like from the guy i THINK i like.. but dont really.

3. did you know Robert Redford (who also starred in Indecent Proposal with Demi Moore) was hottie when he was younger (like in the Great Gatsby)? he was like a brad pitt of that era. LOVES!

4. did you know that in the guy with the largest penis in the Guiness Book of Records fainted every time he got a hard on because there was just such a large amount of blood rushing to is penis?

5. did you know that slavery is a norm from which we have only recently deviated from?

Is my emotional attachment worth more than $8.6million?

I love Beyonce who loves her fat thighs

nono, thats Lynn.. not Beyonce

no.. i didnt go naked..

to the left...

to the left...

Melbourne, ANZAC Day 25 April 2007, The Beyonce Experience.

Dear Mrs K

Dear Mrs K,

I'm really really sorry and regretful about what happened with Hanafi's mobile phone bill. He emailed me that you were really upset, which made him upset, which basically put me in a grumpy mood, considering i was really happy not too long ago when my economics teacher told me I'll most probably get an A for my 4000 word essay. I feel awful but I really cant say anything thats going to make you or him feel any better. True, it is my fault. I am the one who keeps calling. Your son seems to have the amazing ability to go for weeks without talking to the apparent love of his life.. but I dont!

Yes the cost is getting on everyone's nerves, even me. So I asked myself, do I call him alot? Yes I do, for an overseas arrangement. Why do I call him so many bloody times a week? I have nooooo idea. Seriously, you think you're annoyed but so am I. I mean.. I can't even go for 3 whole days without talking to your frustrating son! I cant think of anyone else because of him! If only God could be so kind as to bring another guy into my life -preferably a Melburnian. I want another guy to focus my energy on... so I can momentarily put him out of my head, that way I won't have to keep calling.

A really selfish part of me goes: aunty, you think you got problems? well so do I. You only have to deal with your son's bills. I have to deal with your son.

argh. to call or not to call? that is the question.

love the teen in love
xoxo Lynn

Love knows no colour

mum, my brother and I were watching this show Usher acted in on tv.. some ghetto-bling-bling like thing...

me: mummy! I want my next boyfriend to be black!
mummy: you already had one
my brother and I: He was brown!

i still insist i do NOT have interracial tendencies!

..ok.. maybe a little.. there WERE alot of cute guys in Nepal. i mean.. cmon..just look at those nba players! they look wayyyyy hotter than when chinese guys play basketball and they've totally got the bods! no offense to guys in 4/6 and 4/7 (css 05). and they say black guys are great lovers...seriously.. why confine oneself to one's own race? the grass is always greener on the other side! or should i say... blacker.

and since im on the topic of race, sport and hot guys, i like my footballers bald (zidane n ronaldo?). and PLEASE for god's f-in SAKE! do NOT at watever cost take off ur top while playing soccer if u DO NOT HAVE THE BODY!.. (hint to certain guys in 4/6 and 4/7 css05). do u noe how much it hurts people? i mean.. we cant help but go.. "ooo topless male body!" and then we have a closer look and it shatters us on the inside! it makes us turn to other races!.. and u guys go off n do all that swearing n shit n dialect n chinese. HELLO? BIG TURN OFF?? sooooo not cool. which chick thinks 'oh yes ah beng! come get me now with that dirrty hokkien slang of yours! oh baby!" ????

u just think about that now.

update you, update me

First of all, who wants to change my blogskin in return for something? Make it pretty and I will do something for you in exchange =)

Secondly, and a bit randomly, months ago, I dissed Shakira's music vid Hips Don't Lie. I take that back now, and admire her for doing something different.

Thirdly, I have come to notice, or rather it has become more obvious, my negative points. Example, I am very particular about my friends. Also, I'm highly emotional and melodramatic (I hate that!). I mean I cry while praying for God's sake...not because I can feel God's love coursing through my veins but because praying is a very reflective time for me to ponder about life in general and sometimes I get scared by the things I find. I think too much about mundane things and dismiss the more important things. I always think people have an underlying intention in their actions and words and read too much into them (and then react dramatically to it).

And so, my new year's Attempt at Change (resolution is too strong a word I cant commit to) is to work on those things I mentioned above. I will try not to let my throat get all choked up with emotion when I notice my dad's age spots and sagging skin and reminisce about a time, not too long ago, when he had firm abs and people thought he was on steroids, saying 'wah! Uncle! You fit ah!', I will try not to let what people say and do affect me too much and take a chill pill. I will be less particular about the people I mix with, and try to be less judgemental and prevent thoughts like 'oh my god, what was he thinking when he got dressed today' jump to mind the first thing I meet them.

On a happier note, how can I forget the hot topic on everyone's lips?! Chinese New Year!!!! I have noticed a few things over this CNY that Id like to comment on. Things like when people wish each other "happy new year". This has evolved literally, into a greeting. Old colleagues meet, 'eh!! Long time no see ah! Happy new year happy new year!", somewhat like a chant really. Out of all the "happy new years" that had spilled out of my mouth over the weekend, I am very sad to say, I didn’t mean any. Not even to my parents. Not once, while I wished anybody to have a happy new year did I actually mean: I hope you have a happy new year. I hope this year you will start new and wonderful things and it may it be year filled with happiness. I highly suspect many will find themselves stuck in the same rut. Maybe a long, long time ago, when CNY was created by some bozos, the people really were kind-hearted, sincere and helpful. Not spiteful, greedy and superficial like we all are right now. So, sticking to my new year's Attempt at Change, I will not dwell on the deterioration of Man's morals, and get emotional, but sincerely wish my family and loved ones a wonderful and memorable year ahead and to find whatever you may be looking for. and maybe u will really mean what u wish people next CNy. And will someone please change my blogksin for me?